On the edge of the current: dreamworld

I am filled with this feeling of connection. That there is no separating one thing from another. In that, everything effects everything else.

I have been trying to lucid dream. Last month my dreams were strong, and had narratives, character development. For that month I kept wanting to sleep in to return to the dreams. I felt like i was working something out through my dreams. Like doing something in the dreams may have tangible affect in my waking life.

Now that the dreams have faded I tried to induce some lucid dreaming. Not having to be anywhere today I set my alarm for early and snoozed it for thirty minute increments, in the past this existing between completely awake and completely asleep has allowed me to return to dreams over and over some times making realizations in my partial awakeness that I then I then affect the dream in my partial sleep.

This morning though, this did not work. I had dreams but they were shallow and in my partial wakefulness I began to think about what felt different in those dreams of last month, what made them feel so satisfying? I realized with the dreams this morning I was not in the current of these dreams. I was there, but I was passive, an observer in the happenings with no power. The dreams of last month I was fully immersed in the current of the dreams in the movement of feelings, and images.